I am not eating much. I didn't even have turkey or pie tonight. Just not hungry. I am going to try to get back to swimming but not water aerobics because I have no interest in people other than my family. I really just want to stay home but I think going to the pool is important in so many ways.
I am not sleeping at night. I fall asleep quickly and awaken 30 minutes later and can't go back to sleep. My days are built around things I have to do. Going to get groceries and leaving as quickly as possible so I can come home. I cleaned out the dust bunnies from under the bed today. I changed the bed sheets and swept the floor. I cleaned the bathroom. I look back and I don't exactly remember doing it but I know I did it because it is done.
Well, there is a piece of pie waiting for me with my name on it.
I miss my mom.
Hi Birdie .. all the best - it's so difficult this readjustment to life without your mother - but as you say she's not hurting anymore. Be peaceful if you can .. just let things be and don't worry too much about normality .. just be - with many thoughts ..Hilary
ReplyDeleteBirdie, I hope things will improve for you soon. I'm experiencing some of the same sleep patterns and thoughts as you: can't sleep for long, wake up thinking about my mother... "Time will heall the pain."
ReplyDeleteI know. I still miss my mom, especially at Christmas.
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