Still Waiting

My mom was to be transferred to palliative care yesterday or today but I have heard nothing.  I have been waiting since yesterday for a call from the Palliative doctor but it has not come.  For some odd reason my dad has turned off his cell so I can't get a hold of him either.  I called the hospital three times yesterday and did not receive any answers.  And I am so damn tired.  I was up early this morning to take my kids to school and I found my eyes closing while driving.  I have booked tomorrow and Friday off work but I have to work today.  I have no money saved for a time like this.  (You can thank our Conservative government for that. They have forced low wages on us for over a decade.  But that is a story for another day.)   So, I start work in 20 minutes and all I want to do is sleep.  Actually, all I want it for my mom to be well.  She turns 65 on Thursday.  Mother's day is on Sunday.  Both will be bitter-sweet.  There will be no more birthdays, no more Mother's days.  I hate that.  My emotions and "stages of grief" go back and forth as I breathe. Right now I am just numb with the acceptance because I am helpless.  My mom remains drugged to the hilt and is not in pain at the moment and can't stay awake for more than a minute or two.