Look at the bitch in this picture! She is the reason so much is expected of women. I hate the entire family equally. However, I am going to have a little contest and I will let my readers decide what pisses me off most about the picture. There are no prizes but it should be fun trying to figure it out.
So, what brought on this hate tonight? I had to sew. I took sewing up in my younger days because I married young and I thought that is what a "good wife" does. The thing is I hated it! HATED IT. I didn't have the patience of lining up those marks and pinning paper to cloth. And every single time I would jab myself with a pin. Or step on one. And any project I ever made never fit properly. It always chafed where you don't want things to chafe. And then it totally fell apart by the 5th wash. I did buy a serger but by then my hate had grown deeply and it only got used a couple of times. It ended up in a horrendous knot.
But my love for my daughter made me pull out the machine. She is in Highland dancing. All that was needed was hemming the pants, the bottom of the shirt and the arms. It took me three days. And it looks...well it doesn't look all that great. I just know her dance instructor is going to give me that look. You likely know the look. That look that makes you feel everybody else's children are so well cared for and YOU use medical tape to hem a garment? (Yes, yes I did that once!) I think the teacher was speechless. I mean what could she say? But she did give me that look. Anyway, the medical tape is gone and there are (mostly) proper seems. My daughter can dance her little heart out at the competition this weekend. And when I see her great big smiley face it makes it all worth it.
I do still hate the picture though. Do you know why?
So many things to hate really... so she is very thin, dressed as if she is going to a dinner party or a fancy restaurant while what she really is doing is cooking dinner for her family... the husband is in a suit, the children are all very neatly dressed... and no one really is helping her with anything... they sit and wait while she does everything with a smile on her face... the kitchen is clean and tidy even after roasting a chicken and making side dishes.... there is floral center piece and beautifully set table... she is wearing heals... her apron is so clean as if she had just worn it... did I say enough? Was it any of those?
ReplyDeleteThis is hysterical!!! I love your sense of humor!
ReplyDeleteFirst off, I HATE sewing too. That's why I never do it!
Oh, and the picture: high heals and a cute little sun-dress to cook a turkey? Oh, please. And why doesn't the rest of the family get off their lazy ass and help mom!!! LOL!
Great post!
Well, I'm not sure what upset you, but I can tell you the things that bother me about that picture...
ReplyDelete1. She cooked a turkey in the summer! Do you know how hot the kitchen would be if the oven was on for 6 hours?
2. She is doing all the work... everyone else is just sitting there.
3. She is doing the work in high heels.
4. The kitchen is spotless. Really? She just finished preparing a huge dinner. There should be dirty pots and pans and splatters all over the place.
5. Her clothes are still clean, even though she is only wearing a half apron. When I cook I get stuff all over the front of me.
6. Her waist is the size of a pea. Nobody is that small. Not even Kate Middleton. And if she has had two children, it would be almost impossible!
LOL, I actually had more fun reading your comments! It was the kitchen! I was always taught up as I go, but that kitchen is pathetic! There is no way that woman is not drunk to have such a happy look on her face. My guess is she trips on those red heels and the turkey crashes to the ground. She goes to her room crying, locks the door then dad takes the kids to McDonald's. On the way home the boy gives the girl a wet willy. She cries so hard she throws up all over the back seat.
ReplyDeleteTape is the all-purpose sewing replacer! LOL. The things I dislike about the photo the most? The artist and the society that encouraged such portrayals of women. Also the weird kitchen tiles REALLY bug me. LOL. :D
ReplyDeleteThe worst thing of all is that it DOES make me feel flipping guilty and I hate THAT. We've been away for two days and I've gotten back to a bomb site of mess. I'm such a bad mother and "housewife".
ReplyDeletewhat are you all on about? I do ALL my cooking in high heels - makes falling over look so much more elegant!
ReplyDeleteBirdie, love this post is funny, so real and on the money about some of our expectations put on by our family and outsiders.
ReplyDeleteAnd regarding the perfect wife and mother in red; there is so many things that I dislike. First how the hell she is wearing those heels in the kitchen without tripping in a piece of food and breaking her tush. Second why is everyone waiting to be serve, can they get up of their butts and help? And Why are all smiling? My daughters are usually asking or complaining about when is the darn meal going to be ready or if I want the utensils on the right side of the plate? Third was up with all the food on the table, is this a buffet or just dinner? We will be about 500 lbs. if we ate this way every night!
ha ha ha - this post is fantastic! And Tabuleh's response is excellent too! I was thinking it was the heels. I hate heels, let alone having to cook in them..but then I saw the ENTIRE FAMILY sitting at the table just waiting to be served. Seriously? That's unnerving. Those kids are going to be brought up to be spoiled brats.
ReplyDeleteI do have to say, she must be on something to be that happy after all that work...
ReplyDeleteHmm..... The other three are sitting on their butts while she is hoisting the bird and carrying it into the dining room?
ReplyDeleteI look at this and see a woman who will sit on her butt and read on her Kindle while the three at the table clean up and deal with the left overs.
Or die.
That picture probaby led alot of women to suicide or alcoholism during the '50's & '60's. Everyone above already listed why we should hate this picture from Planet Men Who Shall Not Be Named. What about her hair?
ReplyDeleteI look at the picture and see her dramatic entrance into the dining room when ... ooops, she trips on those heels, rips her stockings and is horified as the greasy turkey flys out the window after depositing half of itself on hubby's suit!
I'm mean.
My mom told me this story. When my parents were first married my father would come to the dinner table wearing a shirt & tie. After a while she was so pissed, one night she put their two plates down and sat down at the table completely naked except for her hat, hat pin and white gloves. Ladies in the '30's were never caught without their hat & white gloves.
oh, did I mention Stepford wives?