A Post Before Bed

Why am I so tired today?  Tired and weepy is not a good combination.

There is an asshole mosquito buzzing me right now.  Not for long, I will kill him. 

My son is sick.  He has an infection in his chest and both eyes and is on antibiotics.  He is 16 and asked me yesterday how people put in eye drops when they don't have a mom.  The funny thing is, I put in a lot of eye drops in at work but when I put my son's drops in my hands shake.  Weird.

Today I dug up 3, 384, 926 dandelions.  Give or take. Then my fiancé and I went out for a late lunch to a place that makes the most delicious sandwiches but they were sold out. *sigh*  We ended up going somewhere else and I got a wrap.  

I need to make things clear about my fiancé and me.  He really is an amazing man.  For obvious reasons the last year has been very, very difficult and I am not an easy person to live with at times.  We are very different emotionally.  I wear my heart on my sleeve and cry at the drop of a hat.  He is very guarded with his emotions and the only time I have ever seen him cry was when my mom was dying and my dad was holding her.  Mr. Birdie is my rock and because this is our first year of living together we have a lot of things we need to work out.  He is very organized and tidy and I am not.  He likes to think things through and I just go with how I am feeling in the moment.  I say I love you to everyone I love all the time and he doesn't say at as often because he thinks it becomes rote. One of our biggest problems us he is an early bird and I am a night owl.  Anyway, I love him so much.  There is no way I would have got through my mom dying without him.  He is the only person, besides my mom and dad that understands me.  Actually, he understands me better.  At times I think I exasperated my mom because of how sensitive I am.  She was an extrovert and had hundreds of friends and am an introvert that is very happy with my own company.  My mom used to get upset that I didn't have a lot of girlfriends and worried that I did not enjoy going out like she did.  Mr. Birdie is also an introvert but not as much as I am. He knows I need my quiet time and need to nap.  He is a good man.  Maybe he could be more sensitive to my moods but maybe I need to be less sensitive and quit reading into everything he says and does.
  
That damn mosquito is still trying to sting me.
  
Tonight the Ungrateful Bastard actually came and sat on my lap for a few minutes.  He took off when he the cat crunchies came out but I still have to give him credit where credit is due. He is still 99.9% evil.  But that is why I love him. 

I did not weigh in yesterday at TOPS so I am going to go weigh myself right now.  Be right back.... Crap.  I am up.  Oh, well.  I am still so proud of myself because I have been eating well.  My Waterloo is Doritos and I have not had them in over a month.  And fries.  Oh, lovely French fries!  And I have to admit that I love McDonald's chicken McNuggets but don't tell anyone. 

Anyway, my son is coughing up a lung, the poor lamb so I am going to see if I can do something to make him feel better.  Even though he towers over me he is still my baby and he needs his mom.

I still have not killed the mosquito.