I was up early(ish) this morning after being awake until 2:30. At least that is what time it was when I last looked at the clock. The world looks so gray and dismal when I am tired. Or maybe it is all the issues of late. Whatever it is, the world is gray and dismal this morning. Every day I am trying to be happy and upbeat but I just feel a lot of dread. I don't know. Whatever, right? There is other shit going on that I just don't have the effort to write about in a post. I have writen it over and over and over and it is just fucking pointless. Sometimes writing brings no resolution or absolution.
My lungs feel deflated. My eyes are heavy. Fuck. I don't know. Going back to bed.
I hope things look brighter after your nap. Chin up, tits out, as they say.
ReplyDeleteMy goodness you are in such a low mood aren't you!? I do hope that the rest helped, but you do certainly have a lot of things to think about not least that girl to think about.. the hard fact is that despite the little one being born is going to end in chaos when he is born, it really is just her life and she has to deal with it and if her father gets involved, well as you said, that is his road, hard as it is... both of you will have to be strong enough to deny the help she probably will need later... God what an awful thing to have hanging over you all.... but one thing at a time.. your children come first and your husband and your self too.. thinking of you and hope you do feel so much better after having a little rest.......God bless and hugs from across the pond..janzi
ReplyDeleteYa gots the January blues!!! Shake it off! Watch YouTube videos of babies laughing, that always brings me joy. Or puppies being puppies.
ReplyDeleteGet out of your head though. Not a good place to be when you feel gloomy.
Hey! You could go down to the ocean and take pictures and post them! That would brighten MY day! LOL!!!! Feel better.
To me the best sentance of Co-Dependant No more was "Just because you detach does not mean you do not care" (or something like that)...we can care but we do not have to carry the burden...it is not ours to carry. The way people keep control over us is for us to keep thinking about their problems and trying to fix the unfixable...let go, Birdie. Don't get into that vicious cycle...xo
ReplyDeleteMore coffee usually helps! Sorry about the insomnia...I have that when major stuff is going on, too.
ReplyDeleteNapping is good. I have found that everything is much, much worse in the early hours - to the point where I refer to it as the 3am horrors. You have so much on your plate at the moment but looking after you needs to be your first priority. When you are on top of that, and not before, then you can start to look after others. Or remind them that they are their own responsibility. Sending many, many good wishes.
ReplyDeleteHave you tried sleeping late and waking up late?
ReplyDeleteI recently discovered that I've transitioned again to the night life...
Anyway, I do hope you're okay and that the problem eventually decides to leave. Thanks for dropping by.
Huggies and Cheese,
Haopee
I just nominated you for the "Liebster Blog Award." Liebster means "dearest" and when I think of that word and the bloggers I know, you are one of the ones that comes to my mind.
ReplyDeleteI've explained more about the Liebster Blog Award on my blog post today.
Thanks again for sharing your blog with all of us
Hope tomorrow will be better. Love
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