A year. You were with
me for over 40 and now it has been a year since you left. I miss you every day. It is not any easier. My god mom, I miss you. I miss you so much. I miss your hands and yet when I look down at
my own hands I see them. When I look
into the mirror I see your eyes shining back at me.
How did you do it all those years? I sure would love to ask you. It is a question that I never considered
until now. You just did it. You loved all of us and kept us
together. Loving was your gift to give
while you were on this planet and I have no doubt that thousands of people‘s
lives were better because of you. I
count it one of my biggest blessings that I was able to be your daughter.
I am not 100% sure where you are right now but I know that I
take you with me every single day. Your
love sustains me. Your memory keeps me
moving. And now I need to stand up and
take your place as the family matriarch, a job I feel so inept to do. But, you taught me well and it is a job that
I can do because anything good in me is because of you.
I'm sorry about your mom. She sounds like a lovely person. I hope she is resting in peace, and that you find some comfort in all the loving memories.
ReplyDeleteMisty eyes here. A truly beautiful eulogy for what sounds like a truly beautiful woman.
ReplyDeleteHard to believe it's been a year already.
ReplyDeleteAs you describe your mother, you are describing what I see in you. You carry your mother in your heart & soul.
Anniversaries are never easy. Take care.
ReplyDeleteLife.....so fragile, Loss....so sudden, Heart....so broken,...in the wake of such a loss, we are haunted by things we don't, and may never understand. Yet the solace we seek may not come from answers. So we look for comfort in the belief of love's everlasting connection. May that love lift you and hold you close, and give you peace.
ReplyDelete"the greatest of all is LOVE"
Yes. She is inside of you. Her genes are yours.
ReplyDeleteAnd yet, that's not enough, is it? That comfort is not comfort enough.
Be as gentle with yourself right now as she would be.
Okay?
Hugs to you today, Birdie. She'll be in your heart always.
ReplyDeleteA beautiful tribute for your mom.
ReplyDeleteHUGS!!
Beth
you are blessed to have had such a mother. you honor her. take care of yourself, dear birdie.
ReplyDeleteAs a motherless (adult) child, I know exactly how you feel. Next month marks the third anniversary of losing my mom. It gets more manageable, that's about it. Sometimes. Life is hard. Big hugs to you!
ReplyDeleteThinking of you today...xoxo
ReplyDeleteOh Birdie...I know how you feel...
ReplyDeleteWhen my Mom died, I knew I wasn't anybody's child anymore...
Noone to fuss over me, in that Motherly way...
Gosh...how I wish she could have met Vivian...Wouldn't that be sweet, eh??
You are a wonderful daughter...
Linda :o)
Hey, hang in there...I'm glad you had such a good mom.
ReplyDeleteBlessings to you on your day of remembrance, sweetie. I am so sorry for this loss, though I know words are so futile right now. I also see my mother in the mirror each time I smile, or look into my own eyes. I miss mine as well but they do live on in our hearts. Warmest hugs, Mina
ReplyDeleteBirdie a year has come and gone and your love remains the same.
ReplyDeleteShe would have felt happy to know you wrote about her and your love for her so beautifully.
I love these words: "Your love sustains me. Your memory keeps me moving."
A year? I know you did mention that this day was coming, but I can't believe a year has gone by. I love these words in your Mum's honour, especially that she taught you well to take this role. When I read this I hear the strength and determination you have to continue what she started. I'm sending you a huge amount of love right now to help you through these days.
ReplyDeleteA beautiful love letter to your Mom. I see my father's hands and eyes in mine as well, and have so many questions I wish I had thought to ask when he could answer them. He's been gone four years and three months, and I still miss him terribly. I try to focus on the happy memories, and gratitude for all the time we had him, because that is the way he lived his life, joyfully, with a sparkle in his eyes and a smile on his face. He wouldn't want me to be sad, that much I know.
ReplyDeleteI've had two dreams of my father since he passed, and he does not speak, just looks into my eyes, and then at the world around us, trying to get me to see too.
You honor your mom by channeling her love and trying to live your life as she lived hers. These anniversaries are hard, and I wish you some peace and comfort in the days ahead.
Beautiful.
ReplyDeleteThe way some people talk about their (living) parents, I want to slap them. But then maybe they weren't lucky enough to get a great one. My mum was great - your mum was great, lots of parents are - and we must count our blessings that we have been so fortunate to know and be brought up by fabulous people!
ReplyDeleteThough heart-broken, you are one lucky woman to have such wonderful love for her. Ironic really - the ones we love and want the most, hurt the most when gone. Cyber hugs to you today on this anniversary.
Lovely words...I can't imagine how it feels to lose your mom, but know that I am thinking of you.
ReplyDelete